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Lessons from Love Island June 12, 2019 – Posted in: Advice, Confidence, Personal Development, Relationships

If, like me, you’re new to delights of Love Island you may, on first viewing, have been shocked on several levels: the amount of flesh on show (I realise this comment identifies me as seriously middle-aged but I grew up with Bananarama and Duran Duran and those guys wore their clothes on TV), the forced/heavily controlled environment (like Big Brother on speed) and the painful desperation of the contestants, all makes for very uncomfortable viewing.…

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GOALS AND PURPOSE – why we need both May 16, 2019 – Posted in: Advice, Personal Development, Relationships

I was lucky enough to marry my partner recently.  After going through divorce in 2011 and then spending 6-years as a single person with three children, it really did feel like a pinnacle moment in my life to be marrying my soul mate.  We had the most amazing, joyous day and then spent a week on a gorgeous island in the sun together.  We were literally lavished with cards, gifts, good will and messages of…

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Have yourself a confident Christmas… November 30, 2017 – Posted in: Advice, Confidence, Personal Development, Relationships

For those of you who regularly read my blog and my advice column you’ll know that I’m all about authenticity and being real. Why? Because perfectionism and mask-wearing are two of the biggest barriers to confidence that I’ve come across in my six years as a coach. I’ve worked with hundreds of people (probably thousands now) and they all tell me that pretending to be someone or something they’re not feeds their insecurities. And dismantles…

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Confidence is a muscle that you need to exercise October 23, 2017 – Posted in: Advice, Confidence, Personal Development

So many people think that confidence is something we are either born with or not but this is a lie!  Confidence is a muscle – we all have a confidence muscle but some of us haven’t learnt to exercise it yet. If you want tight, strong tummy muscles you go to the gym to do your sit ups, crunches, planks, and leg raises 3-4 times a week, you also watch your diet and, lo and…

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Your past is not your destiny October 15, 2017 – Posted in: Advice, Confidence, Personal Development

  I was listening to a podcast recently on which an eminent psychotherapist was asked what she would say to those who remain cynical about the effectiveness of talking therapies.  Her answer was simple, “Your past is not your destiny,” she replied, before explaining how counsellors, coaches and psychotherapists are all in the business of helping their clients detach from their past in order to create a new future. I think I punched the air. …

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Kindness and Quilting June 19, 2017 – Posted in: Advice, Relationships

My daughters were recently given a beautiful patchwork quilt made by my beloved grandmother.  In fact, it was the last thing she made before she died over 20-years ago so they are delighted and deeply touched to have it. They are young, modern kids who love YouTube and gymnastics and shopping sprees.  But they also have huge respect for anything authentic and homemade, especially things they can tell have been made with love and kindness.…

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You can never out-give life… May 29, 2017 – Posted in: Advice, Confidence, Personal Development

Clients often work with me because they want to find out what their purpose is in life.  Or even, what the purpose is of life itself. Here’s what I’ve discovered… Life is about giving – not taking.  Our culture teaches us to grab, and compete, and grasp for stuff/people/experiences/status etc but I believe if you give freely of yourself to life it will always just give back to you.  In spades!  Giving is something I…

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Loving others means accepting them for who they are April 8, 2016 – Posted in: Advice, Relationships

I was recently approached by a father who wanted me to work with his daughter so that she could become the focussed, academic, A* student he knew she could be. He wanted the best for her and could see that she wasn’t reaching her potential. He was very keen for her to have coaching. She, on the other hand, was determined (at age 19) to find her own path. She didn’t want to go to…

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What I’ve learnt from borrowing other peoples’ kids September 13, 2015 – Posted in: Advice, Confidence, Relationships

As many of you know I have three daughters aged 11, 8 and 6. I also have the honour of ‘borrowing’ other people’s children for periods of time as a foster parent to older teenagers. We’ve been fostering as a family for nearly six years and it’s been a wonderful, life-affirming and challenging experience to share our home, our hearts and our lives with the young people who’ve joined our family.

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