Step off the Competitive Parenting Hamster Wheel June 10, 2015 – Posted in: Leaders and Teams, Personal Development – Tags: compassion, competition, confidence, fear, happiness, Life Coach, Life Coaching, parenting, perfectionism
Whether you’re a new mum or a seasoned parent of university leavers there is one thing that will poison your parenting like nothing else and that’s competitive child rearing.
I first noticed this phenomenon when Beth, my first child, was about 4-months old and some of my new-mum peers starting competing to see whose child would hold their head steady first. Seriously! Then the race to weaning began swiftly followed by a competition to see whose child crawled first.
I remember being bemused and quite horrified that my friends were putting their children (and themselves) under such pressure because, for me, life is NOT a competition it’s an experience.
We all know the parents who live vicariously through their children – feeling good about themselves when their child achieves and worrying when their child doesn’t. I just don’t think it’s healthy or right.
So, what’s the alternative?
How about we see our children as gifts that we unwrap a day at a time? If a gift is wrapped we don’t tend to know what it’s going to be and the same is true of our kids. They are in there and our job is to tease out their uniqueness NOT try to mould them into something society measures as “successful”.