True confidence step-by-step March 4, 2020 – Posted in: Uncategorized

Learn how to build true and lasting confidence in a few easy steps

Contrary to popular belief, true confidence is not an exclusive elixir given to a chosen few.

You have confidence. 

You were born with confidence. 

True confidence is your birthright. 

I used to wonder how on earth people were so confident and how they seemed so at ease with themselves. It took the suicide of a friend and my own brush with cancer to wake me up to the reality that I lacked confidence because I was busy people pleasing and trying to impress you all. Not that anyone cared but I did – waaay too much…

I had been listening to fear but there was something deeper and wiser inside me that, when I listened to it, left me feeling authentic, happy, confident. Today, I spend much of my time helping people to do the same.

So, if you don’t feel confident it’s because your natural confidence has become hidden, or you’ve lost it, or you’ve forgotten it’s there. Which is great news because it means you’ve just got to find what’s already there, inside you, waiting to be revealed…

I recently started a YouTube channel and my first “How To” is on just this topic.

In it I explain just what you need to do to find, build and KEEP your confidence in easy-to-apply steps. I’ve said before that confidence is a muscle and it is – one you have to use in order to keep it strong and healthy.

Now, I’d really like you to go over to YouTube and watch the video on there (because I’m quite proud of that little film and I believe it will help you so much) but as a teaser – here are steps one and two in my how-to process …


Believe you have a “confident you” in there somewhere – he or she is just buried somewhere about your person. Simply write down – “I have confidence” on a piece of paper somewhere.


Identify all of that rubbish on top of your buried confident self. What is your confident self hiding behind? This is usually limiting beliefs and fears like

“I should do/be/think… [blank].”

I shouldn’t do/be/think… [blank].” 

“Other people are better at stuff than me.”

“If I show someone who I really am, they might not like me.”

“What if I speak in a meeting and people laugh at me?”

blah, blah, blah…

Now, you could wrap all of that lot together and call it your inner critic or your gremlin. I identified my gremlin way back about 10 years ago and I realised that it was having a field day in my life telling me who I should and shouldn’t be, where I was going wrong, how scary the future was etc. It ruled my life but it was ruling by fear and I had had enough! So, I did what I ask you to do in step two – I wrote down everything that gremlin said to me – ALL OF IT!


I go through all the remaining steps in my video so, if you want to know how to dilute all that rubbish from your inner critic head on over to YouTube for the remaining steps in my debut film.

Oh, and lastly – if your low self-esteem is causing you stress you might find this article I wrote for – How to manage stress to boost your confidence.

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