What has self-love got to do with confidence? March 9, 2016 – Posted in: Confidence, Relationships – Tags:

Somebody asked me last week why I was writing about self-love when I’m a confidence coach. They couldn’t see the link, and for many years I don’t think I could see the link either.
I can now.

In my dark and distant past I thought confidence was all about making sure everything was OK on the outside. I thought that if the bills were paid, the kids were safe and my weight was down then I would be confident. But, of course, I could never guarantee these things long term. The kids were safe today but what if something awful happened tomorrow? The bills were paid this month but what if we ran out of money next year? My confidence was based on stuff and other people and, of course, this left me feeling pretty insecure for much of the time.
However, when I started the journey of coming back to self and learning to like and then love myself, rather than drive myself on and on, then my confidence really started to grow. Not the kind of confidence that was fleeting but the true, deep, lasting kind that was based on my relationship with myself and my spiritual connection. And, this is the confidence that underpins everything I do today as long as I maintain it. It’s the profoundly deep sense I have that everything will be OK, even when the seas of my life are stormy (which, of course, they can still so often be).
Self-loving confidence means I can say, ‘no’ without feeling guilty.
Self-loving confidence means I can ask for help if I need to.
Self-loving confidence means I can manage the chatter in my head.
Self-loving confidence means I believe I can achieve my dreams.
Self-loving confidence means I can laugh at my mistakes and forgive myself.
Self-loving confidence means I do work I adore and work I’m great at.
Self-loving confidence means I just know it’s all going to be OK, somehow…
So, if you lack confidence you might want to try a bit of self-love today. It all starts by getting to know yourself; really getting to know you. Not the you that you think you ‘should be’ but the real, authentic you – warts and all. Just write down who you are remembering both the positive and not-so-positive traits you have. And then read it, accept it and bless it.
There’s more about this in my FREE ebook, which you can download via the button on my homepage (about half way down).
I wish you love, authenticity and confidence this week… x
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