Since a big relationship break up in 2013 and becoming a freelancer, I’ve been living and working on my own, which has caused problems mentally. I am finding myself being anxious about any kind of ‘relationship’, work/sexual/even just sitting in the same room as people… and the more time I spend away from it, the worse it seems to get. I have to really pluck up courage to do the simplest of tasks – like…
Continue readingI wanted to ask you about a relationship dilemma I have. I have been ‘dating’ someone on and off for over a year. We split up after 6 months because he was going through a difficult time with his son and emotionally withdrew or disappeared. I took this as a sign that he wasn’t interested in a relationship and got on with meeting other people.
Continue readingSo, here we all are at the end of another year and counting the days to Christmas. If, like me, you have young children at home then the excitement will likely be reaching fever pitch especially with all the parties, nativities and mufti days adding to the already heady cocktail of anticipation and exhaustion. There’s no doubt this is a magical and special time of the year but there are many for whom Christmas is difficult…
Continue readingA growing part of my work involves relationship coaching; the essence of which is enabling people better understand each other. This applies to teams, families and couples who bravely agree to the intervention of a third party in order to live with more clarity and cohesion in the future.
Continue readingMany of the people I see in my coaching practice suffer with a fear of failure. In fact, I reckon if we all peeled back the layers of our psyche we’d likely find this fear of failure in some form or another. Fear of failure is a fear of being exposed or a fear of not being good enough. It’s also a fear of the unknown based on the belief that you ‘wouldn’t cope’ if…
Continue readingRecently I’ve been thinking about how I handle stress. You see, I used to think I was someone who handled it brilliantly, but actually what I think I was doing, was hiding it quite well. Therefore the stress built up, as did my denial about it. I used to want to be superwoman (I still do sometimes) and in my head superwoman coasted effortlessly through life, being lovely to everyone, coping with everything and looking…
Continue readingA client asked me yesterday about strategy – how to create one and how to stick to one – and my answer was twofold: 1. Know what your purpose is in life (i.e. be intentional in all you do) and… 2. Start with the end in mind
Continue readingI’ve written about gratitude before but it’s worth returning to, as it’s so very, very powerful. If you are feeling low or frustrated or heartbroken then focussing on the small positive things in your life will give you a boost, take you momentarily away from your negative thoughts and give you a new perspective on your situation.
Continue readingI have a client, we’ll call him Tim*, who used to be terribly worried about getting things right and not making mistakes. He worked a normal 40-hour week but then spent an additional 15-20 hours each week trying to improve the work he’d already done or spot any mistakes he might’ve missed. You might think Tim had a tyrannical boss but the truth is he works for himself, runs his own consultancy and therefore the…
Continue readingAs a coach, it’s my job to help people achieve what they want in life by setting goals and overcoming obstacles. But what if the thing you really want is staring you in the face and you just haven’t seen it yet?
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