Today I’ve been thinking a lot about how fear is so closely related to control. For example, if you are someone who worries (feels fear) about the future then this is likely because you don’t know what will happen, i.e. you are not in control! And, as a race, we don’t like to be without control…!
Continue readingAs a society we are encouraged to blame other people for our situations. This is evident in the PPI sales-calls we all get, the accident claim adverts on TV, our conversations about our politicians, the divorce courts, the children’s playground and on and on…
Continue readingLet’s talk about relationships. Because whatever problems you have in your relationships (with others, with yourself, with life itself) is likely to be fear-based. We tend to be fearful of one (or some, or all) of the following…
Continue readingHello, You are not your past. Do you know that? You’re not your past. Your past is an influencing factor in your present – we all have memories locked away that can trigger learnt (automatic) responses today – but you are not your past unless you choose to live there.
Continue readingI’ve been realising increasingly that happiness or being ‘sorted’ is not about how my life looks from the outside but how I choose to respond to whatever happens. If I respond in fear or frustration I am likely to make a situation worse (or certainly feel worse about it) but, if I respond from a place of acceptance and calm I will likely retain my sense of balance and I then stand a far better…
Continue readingHello, I read this recently and thought, “YES!”: “As we demonstrate love towards others, we learn that we are lovable and we learn how to love more deeply. However, as we demonstrate fear or negativity, we learn self-condemnation and we learn to feel more frightened of life.”
Continue readingConfidence is one of the greatest gifts we can give to our children, especially in this era of constant peer comparison on social media. But, how on earth do you instill self-belief into your child? Aside from the basics of love, nurture, support and clear boundaries it’s my conviction that the more I allow my daughters to do things independently of me the more confidence they gain. This can be in the small things…
Continue readingIt’s so easy to look around and see what’s wrong with the world, your life, your day, the weather, that person, etc. Negativity abounds in our culture – the news is teeming with stories of ‘bad things’ happening in a ‘bad world’, we connect with strangers by complaining about the rain and we’re encouraged on TV to revel in our misery by making financial claims for things that have gone wrong. Why do we glory…
Continue readingWhen I was expecting my first child eleven years ago I devoured parenting books with the same passion I had once reserved for the annuals of my favourite pop bands. Why? Because I was SO concerned about “getting it right” and not screwing up my daughter. When she was born I clearly remember doing everything the midwife told me to the letter, again because I was intensely afraid of getting it wrong. When the…
Continue readingHow much do you try to control the outcomes of your life? To try and make people think how you want them to think, or to get that promotion you want, or to force that guy to fall in love with you…?
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